Re: Sometimes I do Hate Men

Before reading this post, please read Sometimes I do Hate Men.

I really liked the post, and way the writer has expressed her feeling, at-least there are few people in our society to display the creepy, ugly and evil part of our shameless society.

I will continue from my comment on the earlier post where I have asked certain questions about the origination of such evil or more I would call Illness of our society.

First of all I would have to agree with SAWJ on his opinion of Pardah. The other thing while reading the post came to my mind was, writer’s general dressing sense. Me being a male, lives on the other side of the society for what the writer has mentioned in her post. I very well understand what in general boys try to hit on and what would they just ignore (if any?).

Advice for girls:

When you are out, try to cover yourself. If you are properly covered, not giving any hints to the peeping eyes AND you are not LOUD (I am sure you know what I mean) as required by our religion, than in my humble opinion half of the guys would just let you spare.

Advice for boys:

Stop fantasizing! Not every girl is of THAT type! Before staring someone, think of your own mother/sister or even wife when they are out?! Would you like same thing to happen them? I HOPE not.

Where the problem comes for:

Okay, coming to my real reason to comment on this is to discuss how the problem became so prominent and why is it on the rise in Pakistani society. I am very sure; only couple of decades ago, very few of the women in bazaars used to face such problems.

I have seen people writing against only against Pakistan and Pakistani society and trying their best to prove them sick and oppressors in case of the women. Girls usually compare our society with idealistic western societies, taking them as role model where women can roam freely without being peeked on. Yes, I do agree with that part. But is “perving” and staring and abusing and harassing comes from the genes? No it is certainly not the case at all. People have written about teaching the boys right manners and behaviour with women and all that.

Trust me it is not an individualistic problem and it cannot be solved in that way either. Our whole nation needs to be trained and taught manners to behave and ideas to follow. But the biggest dilemma of our society is that we are unsure who to follow and what faith to keep. Women wants liberty to roam around freely without wanting to cover up, following fashion trends, dressing latest attires just to feel special and good about their personality but is that kind of society we live in? That is the question to ask.

Islam promotes the idea of Haya and Pardah. Because in an Islamic society there are boundaries for both the sexes, there are set of rules to be followed. In western countries, keeping relationship out of wedlock is very much acceptable, here it is not! Sleeping around is very much acceptable, here it is not! Paying to have a partner is very much acceptable, here it is not! Can't you see the difference? How they are fulfilling some of the very basic human instincts whereas Islam teaches patience, and abstinence. To counter such feelings and urge for such behaviour, where the concept of Pardah and Haya comes in.

They are living in free world with no Halal or Haram principles. We as a Pakistani nation are taught western textbooks in our schools, shown western/Indian shows on our media, yet are bound to behave under heavy restrictions in the society because of the overall Muslim attire of the society. So where goes the frustration? The lust? What about all those feelings?

So the only thing can be said on this topic is, “We have to set our priorities right!”. What do we want to be? A society where all are free to do what ever they like without any religious and moral jurisdictions? Where women can work alongside with male counterparts without being harassed? (If one thinks that is the case with foreign societies) Or the society where men and women have separate roles to play and everyone remains under some limits, where Haya and Pardah prevails in both the genders of the society...

This post is very much open for comments, kindly do so. Ask me if you didn't get it, write your comment if you didn't like it.